Its Personal.

I was 17 years old.

I was a punk rock kid with short pink hair.  I went to punk shows almost every night of the week.  I wore 2 belts, 30 bracelets, and socks on my wrist.  All my friends.. yea, they were in bands.  

This was the life and I was enjoying every minute of it. 

I skipped my high school graduation because I was too cool and promised my parents that they could see me walk at my college graduation. I had been accepted into a prestigious art school in New York.  

This was the last promise I made for the future. Thats because my father would in fact not get the opportunity to see me graduate from college but would actually  lose his battle with his newly diagnosed cancer only 2 months later. 

I. 

was. 

devastated.  

heck, I still am.  

I grew up overnight.  My typical day that summer, which I thought would be spent on adventures with all my friends for our last few months together before we departed for college was spent like this...

- Be woken up all hours of the night to my fathers gagging and puking. 

- Sit with my father during his chemo sessions. 

- Get extremely frustrated because everyone else that went to chemo where my father did, walked in, got their quart full of poison and..... walked out. MY father.... well he was barely coherent.  

- go home.. cry myself to sleep. 

- wake up.......mad at the world. 

- feed my father his dinner. 

- put dad to sleep.  

- go out with my friends and not tell a soul what my day consisted of.  

I am not quite sure how I got through that summer, but I do know that after my father died all I was programed to do was just rebel.  I began to drink.. ALOT and did not end up going to college. 

FAST FORWARD........

- I did end up going to college after all.  I recently graduated and am now a certified teacher.  

- What was once anger has now turned into a passion.  I am committed to finding a cure for cancer.  

This is such a emotional aspect of my life that while it has been 10 years, I still struggle to talk about it without tearing up.  I am grateful I got 17 wonderful years with my father and am looking forward to the day I have children of my own and I get to tell them all about their crazy trouble making grandpa.  :)

I am sharing this now...... because sometimes I get so caught up in life and the drama that goes with it, that sometimes I forget who I am and what my purpose is.  

AND now.. I would like to leave you with a photo taken yesterday during a tour of the new Ann & Robert H Lurie Children's Hospital of Chicago.  This was an opportunity given to me because of my role in the H Foundation.